1. “relationships change with our adult children when (they get older). How do we give advice- should we? Most grandparents are caught in a dilemma of helping two generations without being judgmental or overly intrusive.” (11)
2. “parents…face many common struggles in seeking to relate positively to our adult children while at the same time maintaining our own mental and spiritual health” (12)
3. “‘The choice to be a parent is the choice to have your heart walking around outside your body as long as you live.’ (Anonymous) You are concerned because they are a part of you. The question is, ‘How do I channel my concern?’” (Campbell, Chapman) (12)
4. “‘traditional’ family diminished in importance as our culture became more mobile and diverse.” (16)
5. “There are roles that parents can and should play in the lives of their adult children….we need to better understand our grown sons and daughters.” (17)
6. “great numbers of well-trained young people are looking for fewer and fewer high-paying positions.” (17)
7. “Today’s young people have a different idea of what constitutes ‘the good life.’” (18)
8. “In asking for parental help, they seem to be saying, ‘I need more from you, Mom and Dad.’” (18)
9. “an expectation that Mom and Dad will fund portions of their lives.” (18)
10. “long time to grow up….maturing more slowly; we watch some of them beginning to take responsibility for their lives around age thirty.” (20)
11. “creating a new phase of life between dependent childhood and independent adulthood.” (21)
12. “These differing viewpoints would not be so conflict-producing if our expectations were only for our own lives; but when our expectations lean on our children and seem to create pressures for them, trouble is just around the corner.” (21)
13. “As one father said some years ago, ‘I thought that when the kids were grown, they would take care of themselves, but that isn’t the case. When they marry and have children, my wife and I have that many more people to take care of.’” (22)
14. “a level of emotional dependence he hadn’t expected.” (22)
15. “Parents also find themselves in confrontations with their adult children over dashed expectations.” (22)
16. “We still have many parents and children who work through and enjoy their new relationships as the child becomes an adult.” (22)
17. “Like you, your children care about their future, and they are wrestling to know what to do.” (22-23)

Takeaway points, “How to really love your adult child,” Drs. Gary Chapman and Ross Campbell. (Chapter one)

Can’t wait…this next book I have started will be good, also! Plenty of good research.